11 min

Tt post apr 18, 2017 - b

I have never owned a business, but I would like to answer as if I was the employer of a company that had fewer than 50 employees, and the business was a computer programming/design shop that was profitable, of course.


1. Outside of standard benefits, what benefits should a company offer employees?

It might not be considered a benefit, but I would strive for the four-day work week. The employees work whatever hours are required to complete their tasks on those four days only, either at home or in the office. No work is to be done on the other three days. And no email/messaging after 7:00 p.m. on work days. Save that crap for the next work day. And wherever possible, replace email communication with other software apps.

If we didn't have our own exercise gym, then the company would pay for whatever exercise memberships the employees want. I might pay for home exercise equipment up to a certain amount. I prefer to exercise at home.

I assume that paying for more college coursework and training would be considered a standard benefit.

The company would offer lengthy maternity leave not only for the mom who gave birth but also for the dad or significant other.


2. What should the national minimum wage be?

It's unfortunate that we need a minimum wage.


3. How many sick days should be given to employees?

It's all considered time off, whether it's used for sick days, vacation, appointments, Mud Hens home opener, whatever. The time-off for a new employee with no experience should be a minimum of three per year, whatever is competitive for the industry and region. The amount increases with time spent at the company and/or with experience before joining the company. I would permit carry-over into the next year, and the year after that, and so on, but I would "encourage" employees to take at least two weeks of vacation time per year.

I know what it was like to get too involved with work and not take time off and not exercise and not eat well and not rest properly. It's unsustainable.


4. How often should employees get raises?

Employees should not get raises for "meets expectations." That's called a salary. They were hired to at least meet expectations. Raises should be for something greater, and the raises should occur when the employees earned them and not on a regular schedule.


5. How do you feel about guns?

I do upper body exercises at least three days per week, including bicep curls. And I have no problem with firearms as long as they are not loaded and pointing at me.


6. What are your feelings about employees or clients carrying guns?

I don't have any feelings about either. I'll defer to HR.

Although I might be concerned about a client entering the building with a gun because I would be unsure of the client's intentions. Maybe we screwed something up, or maybe the client didn't like bill.


7. What are your feelings about safe spaces in challenging work environments?

I don't understand "safe spaces." The work will be challenging. It should be challenging. The expectations will be high. Prospective employees would know that before accepting an offer of employment.

If an employee doesn't meet expectations, then that person's "safe space" would be to receive more training or education. The employee would be given plenty time and opportunity to improve, otherwise it's a hiring mistake, and we want to be mistake-free.

For the physically able, we would offer standing desks. Hopefully, the office would be designed to provide temporary quiet rooms or other places to work.


8. In a creative environment like The Silent Partner Marketing, what do you envision work attire looking like?

Work attire can be whatever the employee wants to wear. Same with hair color, piercings, tattoos, scars. I don't care. And if a client can enter our building wearing a gun, then we can dress and look however we want. I'll stand at my desk wearing jeans, a flannel shirt, ballcap, and homemade, crazy socks with my Birks. Our employees could vary from hot-shot, freak show-looking front-end designers to disheveled, "old" C programmers who mistakenly wear two different shoes to work because that kind of trivia is unimportant to them. And if that bothers the client, good riddance to the client. We value craft, and we want to work for clients who share the same mindset.


9. Should “trigger warnings” be issued before we release content for clients or the company that might be considered “controversial”?

Trigger warnings, is that another firearm issue? I would defer to HR because I don't understand any of this. Whatever the dork, I mean, excellent employee in HR decides is fine with me.

br 10. How do you feel about police?

I don't know if I have feelings. I'm glad that the West Toledo police station was re-opened. I like seeing a police car cruise through our neighborhood. I liked seeing the two-person police crew walk Sylvania Ave, and I enjoyed chatting with the officers. I've been pulled over a few times by law enforcement, and I follow their orders.


11. If you owned the company and were to find out that a client is operating unethically but was a high paying client…how would you handle it?

Hopefully, our client portfolio was diverse enough that we wouldn't need to depend upon one major client. We would gracefully terminate our work with that client.


12. When was the last time you cried and why?

I was sad in the first half of 2016 when my Dad slowly withered away due to pancreatic cancer. I was sad when I watched him die last August at his home. And I occasionally get sad now. I miss talking to him about the simple things of life. But three weeks after my Dad passed away, my Stepdaughter gave birth to her first child. One exits, and another one enters. It was interesting to observe both events throughout 2016. Naturally, I took notes.


13. You arrive at an event for work and there’s a major celebrity you’ve always wanted to meet. What happens next?

The only celebrity that I have ever wanted to meet is Ernest Hemingway, and I don't think that is going to happen without some kind of virtual reality, which means I can meet EH in my own time, away from work.


14. What’s your favorite kind of adult beverage?

Delicious beer.


15. What’s the best way to communicate with clients?

That would depend upon the client. If the client wants us to meet at their offices, then that's what we do. Most likely, it would be face-to-face in the early phases of the project, and then electronic communication and phone calls later on, hopefully.


16. What’s your favorite thing to do in your free time?

Read.


17. What are your thoughts on the current college environment as it pertains to a future workforce?

A few years ago, my Stepdaughter graduated from UT with a degree in psychology and a degree in nursing, and now she works at UM hospital. Three years ago, my neighbor who is in his 40s left his manufacturing job to enroll full-time at UT, and next month he will graduate with a degree in computer science. The college environment seems fine.


18. What’s your typical breakfast?

Two fried eggs from a local farmer, toast, plain yogurt with local honey, and either coffee or tea.


19. What’s your favorite drink when you go to a coffeehouse?

Cappuccino


20. How do you handle bullies?

Take whatever they dish out and move on. Jail time does me no good now. I won't waste precious brain cycles trying to reason with an obviously irrational person. I might take notes. The person could provide inspiration for a character in a future short story.


21. How do you handle it when your ideas are shot down?

That has happened a lot, but at least I have ideas. Sometimes, my ideas get accepted. When I stop having ideas, then I'll get worried. Always be thinking.


22. What do you do if a coworker comes to the table with an idea and it sucks?

Maybe hold a private conversation, explaining why the idea may not be appropriate at this time. But at least the person has ideas. Always be thinking.


23. What does the first amendment mean to you?

IT DOES NOT APPLY TO WEBSITES.

Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, and even 4chan delete content that violates their sites' rules. It's not censorship because free speech never existed on those websites nor any website.

Users have the freedom to create their own websites and manage them however they want. But users do not have the freedom to post whatever they want on someone else's website. Too many people mistakenly whine about free speech violations when their content is deleted on a website that someone else owns.


24. What does faith mean to you?

It means whatever Google.com definition:faith returns.

I'll trust the employees to do great work. After all, that's why they were hired. I don't want to micromanage, and I want employees who don't want to be micromanaged. A little hand-holding is okay in the beginning.


25. Who is your role model and why?

My Dad. In Dad's final hours, one of my brothers had to leave because it's tough to coach a college football team remotely. This brother said his goodbyes to Dad, and Dad said, "You better get back to work."


26. “You’re in Starbucks with two friends. Someone runs in and says someone is coming in with a gun in 15 seconds to shoot patrons. They offer you a gun. Do you take it? What do you do next?”

I might shoot myself for patronizing a Starbucks. Or I would spend the next 20 minutes or however much time I had before being shot by the intruder trying to determine how in the hell I wound up in Starbucks. Was Ernest Hemingway there, being a bastard to someone?


27. What does America mean to you?

It means that I can choose not to vote, and I can choose to burn the American flag, and nobody bothers me about my choices.


28. You see someone stepping on an American flag. What do you do?

It depends upon who made the flag. Was the flag handmade by my Grandma? If so, then I would intercede. But if the American flag was made in China and purchased at the dollar store, then I would head to the coffee shop. I'm not getting outraged at every tiny thing. Nothing is inherently offensive. We choose to be offended. I choose sparingly. I have other interests.

BTW, we supposedly have a Nazi flag. My Great Uncle brought it home from WWII. He participated in D-day. His Mom shredded the flag into strips of cloth, and then she wove the flag into a rug. People entered her home, unknowingly wiping their feet on the Nazi flag. At least that's the story. Who knows. It looks nothing like a Nazi flag. It's a well-made rug. That's for certain. It's mostly red with some black. No white though. Maybe that's because the white was used in a circle in the flag. Maybe the story is a family myth.


29. What does “privilege” mean to you?

We have first world problems, like waiting in a long line outside an Apple store for the latest iPhone, and then it rains, and then people complain about the rain by posting to social media, using their perfectly fine "old" iPhones that they waited in line to buy only a year or two earlier.

When we can discard or exchange powerful, functioning computers after only a couple years of usage, then that's some fine-ass privilege. I'm still using my iPhone 5C, released in 2013.


30. What’s more important? Book smarts or street smarts? Why?

Street smarts. And rural field smarts.

Gordon Gekko may not be the best movie character to quote, but I like this one:

Most of these high paid MBA types, they don't add up to dog shit. Gimme guys who are poor, smart and hungry. And no feelings. You win some, you lose some, but you keep on fighting.

https://pi.co/brunello-cucinelli-2/

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